3 Minute Hero Announces 2014 Roster

Once again, 3 Minute Hero has eschewed conventional wisdom in fielding a small-market team. “This season we’re going to focus on raw power, talent, charisma, and stunning good looks,” said band spokeswoman and award-winning historian Doris Kearns Goodwin. She added, “That should provide results more favorable to the band’s loyal fan base than when the band’s focus was centered more on the consumption of off-brand snack foods and the non-stop viewing of Animal Planet shows.” Regardless, fans will know how this strategy is working by the All-Star break.

1. Bryce Blilie – trumpet – ss

2. Dave Kittelson – bass – 2b

3. Jay Kalk – guitar/vox – c

4. Jonathon TeBeest – drums – rf

5. Eric Johnson – trombone – 1b

6. Al “Ice” Berg – keys – lf

7. Jeff Nelson – 2nd trombone/ld.vox – cf

8. Paul Gronert – sax – 3b

note: 3 Minute Hero has no pitchers. Opposing teams are encouraged to bring their own tee.